Finding purpose again in a civilian role

Kelsey Parsonage was 19 when she joined the Royal Air Force (RAF) in the United Kingdom. She met her husband, Sam, in the RAF and served for nine years – and had two children – before the young family decided to relocate to Australia in August 2024. 

While Sam received a lateral transfer to the Australian Army, Kelsey was pregnant with their third child when they moved, so she focused on supporting her two young sons through the move and welcoming their new baby girl shortly after. 

“I thought, I’ll just wait and see what I’m going to do – whether I’ll go back to Defence or not,” Kelsey says. 

“But then I felt really lost when I left the military and didn’t go straight into a job, because I have always had one. Even when I was on maternity leave for my first two boys, I was still paid by the military, and then I went straight back to work. This time was different.” 

Now based in Darwin, Kelsey heard about the RSL Queensland career development workshop hosted by the RSL Employment Program. Feeling unsure about what to do, but wanting to contribute financially to her family again, Kelsey attended the workshop in late 2025. 

“I was just trying to do anything I could to put my best foot forward, really,” Kelsey says. 

“I said to them, ‘I actually don't have any friends in Australia yet. Can I bring my baby?’ And they were like, ‘Yep!’”  

Following the workshop, Kelsey signed up to receive support through the RSL Employment Program.

Support from the first phone call 

Kelsey connected with her Employment Consultant, Jude, who provided support right from the start. 

“It was amazing, because I said to Jude: ‘I'm going to go back to work. I'm going to try and be a civilian. I just don't know whether I can do it.’ And she literally guided me through the whole thing,” Kelsey says.  

“After the first phone call with Jude, I could tell from the way she gathered all the information and tried to understand what I’d done previously that she was genuinely interested in finding the right match for me. 

“She genuinely cared, so it made it easy for me to let someone help me.” 

Despite being unsure of the kind of work she wanted, and whether she wanted to stay within the aviation field or try something different, Kelsey was open to Jude’s guidance throughout the process. 

“Jude told me to send my resume across. It was the first one I’d written since I was 16. She moved things around rather than changing anything and she helped me with my cover letters, because that was something I didn’t understand,” Kelsey says. 

“The bits that I was stressed about were so easy because she just took that stress away. 

“And then she worked with me to find the jobs.” 

That was in November 2025, and by December, Kelsey had her first interview for a civilian job. 

Securing the right role 

The position was Operations Controller with Territory Air Services, a family-owned aviation business in Darwin, which Kelsey felt was a good fit. 

Jude supported Kelsey with interview preparation and advocating for what she wanted from the role. 

“Jude helped me with the negotiation part and making me feel empowered with my decisions, which was nice because I’ve never had to do that before,” Kelsey says. 

“In the military, that’s your salary, and this is what you’ll earn at each rank. There were no negotiations. So, Jude really helped me with that, which was brilliant.” 

Kelsey was offered the role but turned it down because the offer wasn’t quite what she had wanted. Then, a few weeks later, she received another call. 

“They rang me back on New Year’s Eve and said, ‘We can offer you what you want’,” Kelsey says. 

“I had been adamant that I was worth more, with the skills I had, than what was initially offered. And they agreed, which was good. 

“I was really proud that I fought for what I actually wanted.” 

Starting in the role in January 2026, Kelsey was promoted within three months to Aviation Safety Manager, which was another proud achievement for her. 

The RSL Employment Program helped Kelsey return to work and support her family. 

Adjusting to a civilian workplace 

Kelsey says the hardest part has been adapting to the differences between military and civilian workplaces. 

“As much as no two days are the same in the military, the structure and the way everybody works are different. I sometimes have to remember that the people I work with now haven’t been in the military, so they are a little more lax in some ways,” Kelsey says. 

“I have to be really understanding. It has made me grow in some ways and become more tolerant.”

‘Just go and try it’ 

Kelsey now shares her experience of the RSL Employment Program with others, encouraging anyone looking for their next career move to give it a chance. 

“I’ve recommended it to anyone who is struggling. I’ve said, ‘If you don’t know what you want to do next, just go and try it,’ because they are so good,” Kelsey says. 

“The effort and the care that the facilitators have is really second to none.” 

Having settled into her role and reflected on the support she received through the RSL Employment Program, Kelsey feels more confident and has a greater sense of purpose and optimism for the future. 

“Because we’re still a Defence family, we’ll have to keep moving around, and I think being able to take that experience with me will be a real advantage,” Kelsey says. 

“It took me a while to ask for help, and I'm so thankful that I did. I wouldn't go back. I think I’m a better person for it.”